The deep end

I'm in for a long day and a hard road.

Overnight my NG tube got blocked meaning they had to change it this morning but upon my refusal they called the dietician which was better then the threatened security.

So, I met with the dietician to discuss an oral meal plan and instead of slowly introducing it I'm on the full meal plan D: and.I'm.panicking! A full meal plan looks like a juice at every meal and a gold snack at all three snack times cereal at breakfast a sandwich at lunch and a hot meal at dinner and water throughout the day (I really struggle with this).

I then had a disagreement with the nurse about who was going to pull out the tube she left me alone for 5mins and i pulled it out to which she was not impressed about saying i just like to be difficult cause trouble and that my 'not caring' is an issue.

But on a similar note hopefully this brings me one step closer to discharge next week although it still doesn't help my anxiety over how much I'm going to have to consume and how much hangs on me succeeding like the possibility of the NG tube having to be reinserted if I can't manage the full oral meal plan.

But for the time being I'm free from the NG tube and working towards regaining my freedom on the outside world.