I'm back, OP, GP, new meal plan (my meal plan)

So it's official, I'm back! I always turn to you guys when AN slithers her way into my brain like someone sneaking under your bed sheets.

I just went safe food shopping. Hopefully it slows an outright relapse but I'm not filled with lots of confidence. They didn't have the 31.5cal rice cakes I wanted so I had to get the 47.5cal ones it sent my an into a fuzz!

So the meal plan is;
Breakfast-100g yoghurt 39cal
Lunch- 3 s&v rice cakes 95cal
Dinner- whatever mum cooks (about) 600cal
Total-734cals

Damn I hope I can lose weight on this if not, shits gonna hit the fan and bounce off again >.<

Also I had an OP appointment I told her I was being reserved in regards to AN and she was ok with that and didn't do much pushing. I told her I refuse to be weighed blind or not because I believe it dictates my recovery too much she wasn't to keen on that idea but what can they do they can't pick me up and put me on the scales. She said it won't change our therapeutic relationship and she wouldn't mind if I steadily dropped her only concern would be if I say lost 5kg in a wk. I don't believe her. 

Apparently I also need to see a gp weekly again too but as my usual one is away she's making me see someone new, someone I don't want to see! 

I outright lied about my intake saying I was having 3 ensures a day along with meals and I told her I want to start exercising again her only concern was that I'd do it just for ed related purposes dah why else would I exercise? -.- the naivety or the trust?

I also told her about my blog and how therapeutic it was to me to have somewhere to write all the shit down she asked if it was completely anonymous to which it basically is she asked if people comment i practically squawked "no! I only have four followers" maybe one day. But for today i managed to contain myself.

Sorry this is so higgledee-piggledee its been a long morning spent mostly at the hospital with my little brother (asthma playing up) and I'm going to meet a friend (who has battled and is in recovery from AN) too make matters worse she offered to have arvo tea with me OMG NO is what my head screamed and its practically what i said!