My older sister and her fiance came up to visit today which I haven't seen since early January when I was at my sickest in a long time. I was jittery and nervous about my grown physique although I found comfort and solstice in the fact that she said I still 'look anorexic'. She bought me a giant 80cm elephant teddy (for those of you who don't know I'm obsessed with elephants!)
Today also proved challenging because not only did I see my sister for the first time since re-entering 'recovery' but I bought a vanilla chai which a) I've never had before and b) was a deviation from my meal plan that I just wasn't ready for, its left my ED thoughts running rampant.
I'm really anxious about the approaching meal times, about the approaching food, about my impending discharge, I can't slow down my thoughts and I can't articulate them and holding myself together at the moment is proving a difficult task in itself.
My close friend is supposed to be coming up to visit tomorrow and my dad is supposed to succeed that on either Monday or Tuesday and I'm hoping by Thursday I'm discharged. A girl can hope, right? In other news my sisters expecting a baby. GUESS WHO'S GOING TO BE AN AUNTY!?
Meet Guss the Elephant
Xxx Bec
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