Too hard basket

I'm writing this entry with tears streaming down my face making a small Nile river of its own. And I don't know why I'm --what is this thing? Crying!? 

I wasn't discharged today after my epic failure of a weekend but it will be reviewed on Thursday and basically if I eat I have a guarantee so I can go home where I have openly stated to my treatment team I'll go back to square one.

I'm in the 'too hard basket'

Sorry for my lack of words in stuck in a depressive funk 

Xxx Bec