Friday, 24 October 2014

Dads taxi

Today has been busy from the get go

10 to 10 wake up call to get disconnected from the tube. Not only was the volume decreased but also the amount administered per hour was decreased to 40mls from 70mls.

Queue first stop: the bottle shop
Stop two: the cricket club to stock the fridge ready or tomorrow nights trivia night (I'm already dreading eating around a large crowd maybe I'll wait until I get home but I think it's going to be a late night and not possible :( )
Intermission: scenic drive
Stop three: the mt moriac hotel for lunch the second time we've eaten out in two days but it was just us so was nice. I deviated from my safe chicken parmi and chips (I have no idea why it's 'safe' there are far less calorie meals out there like grilled fish but it's kind of my 'treat') I ordered crumbed cutlets with chips and gravy and a side salad with dressing! And it was delicious then I had dessert! Which was even more appetising it was a maple and walnut cheesecake OMG words can no describe the satisfaction!
Intermission: scenic drive home
Stop four: ray's outdoors to look at tents my parents want to start family camping trips again. They can be... Fun.

Finally home where we squeezed in a siesta before the kidly winks got home. All in all it's been a beautiful day with even more beautiful weather! 

My next stop is target to get new clothes because you guessed it I've gained so much weight nothing fits me anymore. It's so depressing to wake up in the morning and try and squeeze into clothes that fitted you last season. To know I've gained so much is disheartening and gut wrenchingly disturbing. It's moments like these I want to pull the tube out but I won't because I know in the unlikely event that I get readmitted to hospital they won't send me home again with one so I HAVE to comply it's my one safety net.

So now I love you and leave you xx

UPDATE: So I went shopping and bought 2 or 3 (the number escapes me now) pairs of shorts and 2 skirts for a whole $100 so I'm happy...kind of I don't want to fit into them for very long I want to be in my smaller sizes once again...one day. I looked in the floor length mirrors picking apart my body hating every inch of it wanting to cry but my mum was waiting just outside and I don't think she'd quite know what to do with me if she saw that. So silent sobs into the pillow before bed tonight it looks like. Also I'm sick of everyone staring and commenting at my tubed up face (I forget its there until someone draws attention to it) maybe I should walk around with a flashing neon sign above my head saying "I HAVE ANOREXIA" a bit dramatic? I think not.

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