Homeward bound?

I have a new room mate she's 20 in three weeks so I'm still the baby on the ward. She's in for her type 1 diabetes. She doesn't manage it very well. She even encouraged me to eat today (to no avail) which was nice and a little irritating. She meant well though so I can't complain. 

The registra paid me a visit yesterday saying the wait period to get in to jc has gone from 48hrs to 2 weeks to now 2 months. He says there's a meeting Monday to discuss weather I should go home with the NGT and wait or go to the swanston centre and wait. I'm sure you already know my preference. 

Dad rang me and told me he had spoken to mum and although they're not happy with a 2 month waiting period for jc they don't think I should go to swanno. Provided i don't pull the nasogastric tube out. So going home in the meantime is looking promising. Yippee.

I'm still surviving off coffee and nasogastric tube feeding. I feel like a pathetic waste of time and space. I feel like I'm crying out for attention when I know this is the last thing I want! And as the days go on the urge to pull out the tube/tamper are also becoming increasingly high but I'm trying to keep my eye on the prize so to speak. Trying to avoid the swanston centre at all costs except of course to visit my wonderful friend who has become trapped in its vice again. 

The nurse just woke me up to eat dinner it's a freaking smorgasbord! Chicken alaking orange juice full cream milk milo tiramisu and two fruits needless to say I screwed my nose up at it even though I could die to eat it. My anorexia is so domineering it ravages through my head like a wild fire compelling me not to eat.

So the hunger strike continues... sort of.